Leopard Print and Spielberg's Lost Merch

The week in Diamond

Quick note! The first subscriber-only post is going out next week. It’s my guide to NYC. I promise there is going to be a lot more stuff for people that are forking over a few bucks to help me build this bad boy, but I could always use more. So if you could, I’m out here, just a guy asking for a few more paid subscribers. If you want the subscriber-only stuff and can’t afford it, just hit me up. We can work something out.

For those of you that keep up with me on one of the thousand other social media platforms, but especially on Instagram, you might know I’ve been out of town and “on vacation” the last two weeks. When this hits your inbox, I’ll be on my way back home to New York, and I feel bad saying this, but I couldn’t be happier. It’s not that I don’t love vacations, it’s just that I’m not that good at them, especially ones where I’m supposed to be relaxing. I know the 2023 belief is that we all work too much and we shouldn’t, and I agree with that. But I also think I’m a victim of that whole if you love what you do you’ll never work a day in your life thing coming to bite me in the ass. I’m sort of always working whether I like to admit it or not. Whether I’m reading or eating or people watching, I am likely filing something away in my brain for later. And the thing with me is that if I spend too much time not feeling like I’m creating, then I start feeling like crap. My goal in the coming months is to figure out a hobby that lets me be creative but doesn’t involve anything I put out in public. I paint, but I can’t schlep my paints and brushes along on vacation with me, and that’s more of a mood thing. I have to want to do it. Any suggestions would be welcomed.

That said, I think I did a pretty good job chilling out more than I usually do. I read a few books and made Emily rewatch Burn After Reading with me, which I believe is the first time we’ve ever watched a Coen brothers movie together in 15 years. So that was nice. And also, after a year or two of trying, I think I’m getting the hang of big cat prints. I grew up seeing many people wear leopard or cheetah spots when I’d visit grandparents in South Florida, and I always liked the look. I think the thing is—for me at least—is you’ve got to lean into the silliness of it. I did hear a lot of “Tacky” vs. “Gaudy” sort of discussions a lot as a kid. Going to TJ Maxx in Boca with my nana once, I witnessed a woman with huge hair look at her friend and go “Oh my gawd, don’t you love this?” She held up this head-to-toe leopard print tracksuit, and her friend, in a similarly nasally New York accent not that unlike Fran Fine’s, went, “Oh my gawd, it’s so gaudy. I love it!” Then, a few hours later, we were driving and I remember my nana looking at the way one of her new neighbors decorated their lawn and going “Oh gawd, that’s so tacky” with this look of pure disgust on her face. Ever since then, I’ve been fascinated with the idea of gaudiness and tackiness. I think I like gaudy, and I’ve obsessed over John Waters enough to know I enjoy camp, but I wonder if and when I ever lean into tacky.

A few years ago, when I was working on a piece for GQ about leaning into gaudy, I asked the great Rax King her thoughts on what gaudy really means. Specifically, I wondered if there was a difference between gaudy and tacky since Rax is sort of the expert on that topic given she wrote a great book called Tacky. I think about what she said a lot. “I feel that tacky is the word we use to cast negative judgment on something that’s gaudy,” and added, “If it registers as gaudy, we decide we don’t like it, we call it tacky.”

I’ve come to think of both words as similar but different enough. To me, gaudy is comfort. If you spent any time in Miami or Ft. Lauderdale in the ‘80s or ‘90s you probably know what I’m talking about. Tacky, on the other hand, is a little dumber, but there can be something interesting and pathological about it. I think that’s what I got from Rax’s book and I wrote about something similar a few months back after I looked at Larry Flynt’s estate sale. I think a mindless embrace of tacky really tells us a lot about a person and there’s something fascinating about that to me.

Anyways. Here’s me being gaudy but possibly being tacky. The hat is from Genghis Cohen in L.A. Shirt is vintage. Bathing suit is Polo. Sandals from Mohinder.

Melt Stuff

A book that I’m really excited about was released into the world this past week. Ruth Madievsky’s All-Night Pharmacy. This book is fascinating to me. I think a big part of the reason is Madievsky’s sense of humor is great, but I also think there’s a specific tone to a book like her’s that reminds me of Karolina Waclawiak or early Gary Shteyngart, the sort of POV only an immigrant born from an Eastern Europen country (Madievsky was born in Moldova) has. Immigrant and first-generation fiction in general tends to be my favorite stuff given that I like seeing America through the eyes of somebody who has to play catch up or who maybe was born here but lives in a home where the culture is different and the main language isn’t English. But All-Night Pharmacy really worked for me because along with those other modern writers I mentioned, something about it reminded me of the Polish writer Bruno Schulz, except he lives in Los Angeles and does a lot of drugs. That said, I loved it.

There’s a real monster of a team-up between Old Jewish Men and Director Fits. It’s a tribute to Steven Spielberg’s $7 million 300-seat submarine-themed follow-up to Schindler’s List. No, it wasn’t a film; it was the restaurant he opened with Jeffrey Katzenberg that they called Dive! Part Planet Hollywood, part Universal Studios, the place was maybe Spielberg’s biggest flop to date, but like any other great failure, it left behind some good merch. Go to the Old Jewish Men site to cop a hat or shirt.

• Another good thing is the Fantasy Explosion x Bloomingdales old-school racingwear collab. I’ve got a few of the Fantasy Explosion hats in my closet that I break out from time to time and they’re some of my favorite snapbacks, all looking a lot like something you’d see a yuppie dad circa 1989 jogging in.

• And speaking of jogging, I know that every week seems to bring some new take on some old pair of New Balance sneakers, but I am really partial to 998 Made in the USA models and wear my grey ones almost all the time. But I will say I’ve been hoping to see a pair come out in black, especially for the wintertime, so I was happy to see it was announced this week that I’ll have my wish sometime in the future.

Melt Reads

If you’re like me, you probably think it’s a little weird when you show up to a bar and you need a reservation. I get it on one hand, especially with the glut of places TikTok people and tourists “have to check out” getting filled up so much these days. But still, it’s a little much sometimes. I won’t name names, but a few weeks ago I tried to get one of the five open seats at a West Village bar that I won’t name, and the host stopped me and asked if I had a reservation. I didn’t, but I wanted a quick drink before dinner. They said sorry, they hold those for reservations. So I said fine. I got a beer and sat outside of the bar for 30 minutes and watches as nobody sat in any of the seats. It seems like a not great system, possibly a way to keep people out more than bring them in. I guess it’s up to each place, and sometimes I don’t mind knowing I’ll be able to have a table in advance. There are plenty of pros and cons to this, and thankfully, Robert Simonson is just the right person to dive into the conversation.

Read: “Have Reservation Apps Forever Changed New York Bar Culture?” by Robert Simonson at The Mix with Robert Simonson

You ever watch one of those HGTV home renovation shows and notice how the “After” version is like they just grabbed the worst stuff from the dumpster of a Target, shined it up, and used it to redecorate. A study said that people mimicking the decorating they see in those shows has made our homes “boring and sad” a Bucknell University study shows. I say less boring and sad HGTV decorating and more framed movie posters is the way to go.

• Read: “HGTV is making our homes boring and us sad, one study says” by Rachel Kurzius at Washington Post

I’ll be honest and say I sometimes feel a little dismayed at what I consider nu-metal revisionism because I hated it then and I sure as hell hate it now. But I’m also the guy who lives by the idea that things deserve another look years down the road, that maybe what sucked 20 years ago might have a different meaning now, so I get it. I’ve tried to defend Candlebox more than a few times saying “You don’t understand, man. Being 13 and “Far Behind” comes on the radio and you and your pals are splitting a pizza from Domino’s after smoking weed for the third time in your life was an original vibe!”

I still don’t think nu-metal is good in any way, but I do appreciate Korn trying to slay you with hot sauce or Disturbed trying to get you to be down with the sickness…as well as their dark roast coffee, so this piece by Ellie Skrzat was a fun read.

• Read: “Nu-Metal Cuisine: Korn Koffee and Hot Dog Flavored Water” by Ellie Skrzat at Taste

Finally, Amanda Mull puts aside any lingering suspicions you may have had about whether or not this was the Summer of George and looks into why everybody is dressing like Kramer these days.

• Read: “It Was Only a Matter of Time Before Everyone Started Dressing Like Kramer” by Amanda Mull at The Atlantic